Close your eyes

little one.

Drift off to dreamland.

And, God will protect you

Underneath His sheltering wing.

Go to sleep

Little one.

Dream of tomorrow;

Where sunshine and bluebirds singing

Will the morning bring.

as you lie there a sleepin'

a dozin' and a dreamin',

my thoughts course through our busy day.

the smile that you gave me

your little hugs that enslaved me

your sweet, innocent, cunning ways...

the memories I hold dear

of times you let me be here

I hope never will go away!

one day you will grow up

and become a man.

sooner than later

maybe you'll understand

why this teardrop falls down my face.

ahhhhh these sweet days

as I watch you sleep.


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Quinn-William Alexandar

10-13-98 2:09 pm

6lbs 10 oz, 19/2 inches

We went into labor ( weeks ago really) monday nite and went off to the hospital where they monitored us and checked us and sent us home. We went for chinese. (I was to the potty and sitting back with contractions all through dinner LOL. )

By 11 pm that night I was in a lot of pain so we went back. A little progress had been made so they decided to keep us for observation. We watched the movies we had brought with us and camped out for the night.

Throught the night the contractions slowed ( as they had been doing for a couple of weeks) but so did baby's heart rate. His heart rate dipped with each contraction and then recovered. By the morning we hadn't progressed much at all and they almost sent us home again then reconsidered for baby's sake they would keep us and augment with pitocin.

The augmentation started and intrathecal applied after a couple of hours contractions sped up but progression was still slow and as the contractions got stronger baby's heart rate dipped lower. Even with me on oxygen all morning ...

By 11 am I was still only at 5 plus cm and by 1 barely at 7 cm and baby's heart rate was dipping to 60 and not recovering as fast. And when it did it was only going back up to 90 or 100. The doctors were worried and called in an OB specialist. Once he had arrived and checked me, He said, " We don't have time to wait until 10 cm ". They handed us c-section papers to sign. Things moved FAST!!! They prepped me and whisked us off to the OR. I was so scared I was shaking. ( I was in transition as well hence the shaking) And,when they gave me gas and oxygen and numbed my body from the chest down, strapped down my hands and feet and put up a tent, I REALLY was scared!!

Sheesh this is how I imagined alien abduction stories!

Hubby was wonderful! He held my hand and rubbed my cheek. He seemed so excied and thrilled to be in the middle of all the action. He helped me stay as calm as I could despite the situation. Later I relaized he was as scared as I was.

Once I heard Quinn cry and they said, " ohhhhhhhhhhhh what a good looking boy!" I smiled and gasped and finally started to calm down. I got a little nervous though when hubby asked the doctors, " what's that?" and they said, " that's her uteris." YIKES!!!! ( they took it out and laid it on my tummy to repair the cut)

Quinn was whisked by and hubby followed to the nursery as I was sent to the recovery room.

I didn't get to hold Quinn or even really see him except for the poloroid hubby brought to me for another 3 hours or so. But when I did I wasn't letting go! My sweet little survivor!!!!

My hospital visit was fine except for 1 well meaning nurse giving Quinn a bottle one late night feeding ( she thought I needed the rest and he had a touch of jaundice). I WAS IRATE! And 1 nurse was just rude the last morning I was there I just made faces at her and stuck out my tongue as she left the room... the ninny! But,I had cable tv, good food, sweet nurses and a sweet baby to enjoy. What more could I ask for?

Home now for two days we are both doing fine. I am still a little sore and Quinn is still a little jaundice but, he is nursing like a pro and has plenty of wet and dirty diapers. ( I squeal with delight at each one!! I so wanted to nurse this baby and nurse for a loooooooooooong time. ( so far so good) ( I even got excited when he spit up for the first time today LOL) Just another sign he is thriving and getting enough milk.